"I was bitten must have been the devil"

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

Parents vs Non-parents

I was walking thru a outdoor mall today and I overheard a parent telling their child that the horse ride is broken. You know the kind I'm talking about, where you pay fifty cents and the kid is rocked back and forth for 60 seconds and its the highlight of their day. What I found funny was that the kid didn't even question that the ride was broken, and it most likely wasn't, that's just something us parents say to make our kid shut up faster. If I wasn't a parent myself I would've popped in a quarter to prove it worked, but I can't now because I know better. I am a parent now.

When I was a non-parent, I'd see kids going crazy to get their mothers attention. I'd be in a mall and the Mom is talking to someone while this kid is pulling at her mother saying "mom,mom,mom....MOM!" I used to think "I would never do that" (when I was a non-parent). Now I know that child has nothing relevant to say. Nothing that kid says after being a pest for attention will affect anyone's day. The kid may think its very important information, but they must learn that 85% of what they think is vital is really nothing at all. A non-parent does not understand this. A non-parent will give you a dirty look for being so mean to a child.

I've walked by cars in the grocery store and seen a parent loading up 3 kids all under 10 years of age and completely snap because one kid asked for a piece of gum. I used to feel bad for the kids, when I was a non-parent. Now I know that kid was most likely bugging the parent for every thing he's not supposed to have in the store.

I once told Devin that McDonalds was closed because we didn't have time to go to the Playland and I didn't want to start a war by saying 'no'. Well, guess what? He bought it! Hook, line and sinker! Now he asks if McD's is open when we drive by and I can say "not yet". A non-parent wouldn't like that, I know non-parents or worse yet, soon-to-be's who say "I would never do that". Bullshit. Soon-to-be's are worse. They get on a soapbox over everything. But that is for another day.


  1. Be careful, buddy. ; ) Soon enough he'll be able to tell. "Hey, what'd'ya mean? Why are all those cars there if they're closed?"

  2. I was just watching "The Middle" and the school "social teacher" told the mom she needed to "play" with her kids more. So she was reading a magazine across the room and letting the kid move the game pieces for her. I think that's kind of mom I may have been. LOL, I have a good relationship with my young adult kids. I think it all worked out.

    I found my way here from a link on Whit's sight. I came over from Blogstream. I hadn't been blogging regularly for over a year to learn of it's impending demise.

    I like your straightforward opening blog comments.

    Enjoy the little ones.

    Bohemian :)

  3. Nice post about the differences in perspective. I'm only experienced the non parent side. Don't know if I've judged too many parents. In some cases if the kids are brats, I just am thankful to be able to walk away to some piece and quiet.

  4. Now you know lots of things that non-parents don't know. And that knowledge comes in handy on occasion. :)

  5. One thing I liked about blogstream was that I could CC comment responses so the person they went to got them in their email. So, I will just say this
    @nota- Luckily for me he's only 3 and doesn't have the ability to recognize lies yet.

    @Bohemian- Welcome to the blog, I found your site and am also following it.

    @Skinny- I remember those days fondly

    @Whit- I have inside information, and information is always power.

  6. This made me crack up.

    I'll never forget (nor live down) the time that my friend Paula came to visit me with her then-two-year-old. Blissfully childfree at the time, I was horrified that she ALLOWED her child to whine and cry in the car. I actually said, "Can't you do something about that?" I secretly thought, "my children will never do that."

    Famous last words, I tell ya. ;)

  7. I know it is over 25 years late, but how about this one, "Um Bryan, the popcorn machine is broken" Yep that would have been better - much better.